Why HE does not complete you!

He does not complete you!

The whole point of being alive is to evolve into the complete person you were intended to be. ~Oprah Winfrey

As cute as that movie is, with Tom Cruise uttering those iconic and very romantic words, “you complete me”, if you enter your dating life with that thought and expectation you may be in for a very rude awakening. Well, I guess what I should ask is, what does this statement mean to you? Does it mean that the person who comes into your life will bring missing and needed ingredients that will fill the emptiness and or fix the issues in your life? Or maybe they will be able to love you enough to take away any insecurities you may have? Here’s another thought, maybe they will help you get rid of lingering feelings that you are not good enough and show you that you are good enough, desirable and wanted.

All of those issues can and do exist in many of us and they are definitely in need of being remedied, but these are issues we must work on by ourselves. Solo, without another person as a co-pilot. I know for many they are saying, but isn’t that part of a relationship? Shouldn’t we expect our loved one to help us in our time of need? Absolutely, we should expect moral and emotional support from our loved ones. But, these issues are issues that need more than support. They are deep rooted issues that have probably been around since childhood. They need dedicated therapy to discover the root so a future plan can be set in motion to help change that detrimental mindset. More importantly, it is only natural when we are missing and hunger for something, we will reach for whatever is handy to satiate that need. If you have a loving and giving mate, it is not hard to see how they will now become your feeding source. It may not even be intentional, but unfortunately it is a very easy thing to do.

Also consider this, while you are in this vulnerable state, you can be easy prey for someone who will soon turn your life upside down, more than it already is. They can do so because you will be quite needy and maybe even desperate. It is easy to exaggerate situations and see more than there is. So, taking this line to heart can definitely be bad for your heart. You don’t need someone to complete you, you need someone to compliment you. Good relationships happen when two complete people come together. They both bring 100% to the table. They show up willing, knowing and ready to give all that is needed to sustain the new bond they have created. They are supported by their mate in that they add to what they already have and vice versa. Next time you see this movie and hear this line, you can smile to yourself and say, “Hollywood, your fairytales are more than just for a Disney movie.”

Peace & Light

Follow me on Twitter https://twitter.com/CarollAtkins #LoveDesignLife


About Caroll Atkins

Loving Designing Living!! All forms of design intrigue me. As a graphic designer, I design for my livelihood (C.A.SlyDesigns) but as a writer, I do it for my living! At this time in my life, I MUST write. LoveDesignLife, is my joy and my gift to you. If my articles resonate with you, I pray they will also help you in life much as living them and writing about them has helped me. Today, it is no longer about thinking outside of the box. It’s bigger!! It is all about “Transcending the sphere!” coined by yours truly. I work hard to accomplish my goals. However, if I ever fall short I don’t worry I just eat cake cause tomorrow is another day!!
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12 Responses to Why HE does not complete you!

  1. I hear what you are saying. I love this. My guy totally compliments me and makes me feel so good. I enjoy that but know that I would be just as good if he were not there.

  2. I too always say a man should compliment me, not complete me. Sometimes people mix it up and say two people should come together in marriage to make a whole. Instead, two whole people should merge, making each other even stronger!

    • Is there anything that we make a willing choice to purchase or acquire knowing that we are getting just a portion of it? I can’t really think of anything. I think people can agree in theory this does not work for a relationship either but they still want to embark on this trip. Even thought we can learn from each other and yes teach each other, we cannot and will never complete each other like falling in love in the first place, that is a feat that only the individual can accomplish!

      Peace & Light

  3. I agree the person you get together with should compliment you … not complete you. When you rely on someone else to fix the issues you mention above that is asking for a lot. It sounds exhausting and more than likely the person will not stick around. I know I wouldn’t if someone needed that much work lol That’s what a shrink gets paid for!

  4. There are so many statements in this post that my husband and I share with people when they ask us how we have managed to stay happly married for 25 years. But mariage is too complete people who compliment each other. My favorite is the 100 percent remark. If we both give 50 percent we are both giving a failing effort. When we both give 100 pecent we are giving it our best.

    • Well, it is a good thing to know that the advice I am giving is resonating with a 25 year married couple. Let’s me know I am on track 🙂 Thanks for the comment Janeane!

      Peace & Light

  5. Mandi says:

    I heard that!! I think many times in relationships too much pressure is put on the other party because people are looking to be complete, but we are human. The expectation is in the wrong place from the very beginning.

  6. I love it! You don’t need someone to complete you, but you need someone to compliment you. Great idea!

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